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My Amnesia Girl

If you take a burger with you inside the theater, it’ll turn into a cheeseburger. That’s because this is possibly the cheesiest Filipino film. Ever.

Cheesier than that.

Might as well bring a plastic bag with you when you watch it, just in case you feel the need to throw up at some of the cheesiest lines ever delivered onscreen.

Since we’re on the subject of amnesia, here are a few things most of us might have forgotten:

1. Good acting does wonders to a film.
Among all the John Lloyd leading ladies, I think Toni Gonzaga has the best acting chops of them all. Although this is a rom-com, Ms. Gonzaga tends to focus more on the rom than on the com. Which is good, because it shows that she has a serious side.

"Listen to me... we need this watermark to protect us from copyright infringement."

2. Carlos Agassi is an annoying douche.
Yeah, we get it. You’re ripped, and you got a nasty six-pack. But who the hell cares, man? The girls may be screaming for you, but the guys honestly just want to beat the crap out of you. Shove your six-pack up your ass, douchebag.

The tux doesn't lessen the douchebaggery.

3. A John Lloyd flick is worth watching.
No, I’m not saying this because John Lloyd is a great actor. He’s a good actor, maybe, but not great. So why do I say that his films are worth watching? It’s because the film industry believes that John Lloyd films are potential blockbusters, so they focus all the best people to work on those projects. So it’s actually the collaborative effort of all the filmmakers who believe in John Lloyd, and not John Lloyd’s mere presence, that makes a John Lloyd movie great.

Sign of douchebaggery: Not showing your teeth.

4. Atoy Co’s hair looks like… shit.

"But I can dunk!"

Honestly, how many more basketball players will they resurrect from the grave? Not all ballers can act. So please don’t do this again. I’m talking to you, Star Cinema.

5. This is the cheesiest Filipino film ever.

I've already said that.

But let me just expound. The title makes it seem like this was ripped off from a Korean film, but surprisingly, the story is all-Filipino. And for those who didn’t know, there were actually three scriptwriters involved, so the sheer volume of cheesy lines shouldn’t come as a surprise anymore.

And since this movie has “Cheesiest Film Award” written all over it, let me share with you a line that someone once said to me:
“Pirata ka ba? Kamukha mo kasi si Johnny Depp e.”

*pics from Will Video For Food, Pinoy Movie Blog, Asian Bitejonas.ph, Sri Lanka DOT, and Wordpress

My Amnesia Girl. Philippines. 2010.

Original rating: Seven out of ten.
Me crying at the birthday scene: Plus half a point.
Final rating: Seven and a half out of ten.


Maricar said...

Super agree ako sa number 2.

Nakakapikon e. Sobra.

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