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Da Couch Tomato Podcast, Episode 49, discussing the Netflix Filipino animated series Trese, why this is a huge leap forward for Filipino representation, and our thoughts on Filipino stories being told on the global stage.

Sting Lacson's rating: 8.5/10
Rachel's rating: 8/10
Final rating: 8.25/10

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Da Couch Tomato Podcast, Episode 5, discussing Jerrold Tarog's Goyo: Ang Batang Heneral, this film's place in the trilogy, and Goyo as an old-timey fuccboi.

Hosts: Sting Lacson and Giosi Mendoza

"Akala ko game ka talaga magpakalbo."

All in all, a commendable effort from Michael V. That's commendable, not laudable. There's a difference.

The story of Family History is pretty solid: a married couple going through a crisis, reminiscing about the good old days. The screenplay, however, needs improvement. Yes, the story isn't the screenplay; again, there's a difference.

Early in the movie, there was a sequence which focused on Alex (Michael V), which was supposed to be the turn of events from his point of view. The next sequence was then more or less the same, with slight variations, because this time it is told from his wife May (Dawn Zulueta)'s point of view. Personally, I would not have fallen into the trap of using this technique, which was reminiscent of Groundhog Day. This technique is best used with multiple characters, and the timeline is short enough to be repeated. That said, using the technique in just a part of the movie, with just a few characters, does not work.

The acting was all right, especially Michael V's performance, which was the strongest performance in the entire film. Dawn Zulueta, sadly, delivered her lines in the sing-song manner typical of movie stars. Paolo Contis was all right, but then you realise that most of his roles are practically the same, so that's not really an achievement, while Kakai Velasquez was terrific as the film's comic relief. The best performance, in my opinion, was Nonie Buencamino, but unfortunately, his screen time was limited due to his supporting role.

The cinematography was all right, except for just one tiny mistake. In the bar scene, where Michael V, Contis, and Buencamino were discussing their problems over drinks, the overhead light was so strong that you could see it penetrating Nonie Buencamino's ears. Human ears, for those who don't know, are not opaque; they are slightly transluscent. That means if you shine a light bright enough behind someone's ears, the light will shine through. And that's what happened in this scene. The back light was so strong it turned Buencamino's ears pink. It was distracting.

Given that this is Michael V's first, I'll let some things slide. He could have added more of those animation sequences, like way more, given that Alex was an animator, after all. My main problem with his directing was that he treated the sequences like sketches from Bubble Gang. Yes, having some comedic moments can diffuse the tension in a heavy drama, but not to the point that the jokes upstage the narrative.

All in all, a commendable work, and I was entertained enough to give the director another chance with his next film.

"Ayaw mo mag-podcast nalang, Bitoy?"




Family History. Philippines. 2019.



Original rating:
Dawn Zulueta's hotness: +0.1
Eugene Domingo: +0.1
Final rating: 6.9/10
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Da Couch Tomato Podcast, Episode 4, discussing Erik Matti's Buy Bust and Richard Somes's We Will Not Die Tonight, how the Bacolod filmmakers are pushing the envelope for action movies, and how female action heroines might be the next trend.

Hosts: Sting Lacson and Giosi Mendoza

Viva Ent on YouTube

I'd just like to answer some allegations that the film 10,000 Hours was about me, or loosely based on my life.

Yup. Totally based on my life.

Flickr

When I first heard of Karl Roy, I was in first year high school (or seventh grade, I don't really remember), and I thought Roy was his second name, like John Paul. I also remember the ever-catchy lines ♪Sige na people / let's get on down / sige na, sige na, sige na, sige na-haaa♫ from the song "Yugyugan Na". It was only in college when I realized, "Wait a minute... P.O.T. spells 'pot'! As in 'marijuana'! I see what you did there!"


Wait... are those flowers on top datura inoxia?

Although I am not that familiar with his Advent Call days, I believe Karl Roy's best work was with Kapatid. Honestly, I think his vocals would work well with heavy electronica. Also, he kind of reminds me of the insane white boy from The Prodigy.


Above: Caucasian Karl Roy

Karl Roy, by the way, is the brother of Kevin Roy, the lead singer of Razorback, and the first cousin of Judd Roy, one of the defense attorneys for the impeachment case against Supreme Court Chief Justice Corona. I'm not sure if he was related to Jay Roy, one of the hip-hop guys from my high school. He is survived by his spouse Dena Roy and his daughter Arriana.

Before we go, here's one last look at Karl Roy, thanks to our friends from Rogue Magazine and Pelicola.tv.


Requiescat in pace Karl Roy. The best scat man in the Philippines. (Are they called "scat men" or "scatters"?)




Karl Roy. 25 May 1968 ─ 13 March 2012.
Most people, when met with the news of Bodjie Dasig's death, will give this reaction:

"What a sad day for Philippine television! I loved him in Batibot!"

No, kids. That's Bodjie Pascua. Here's Bodjie Dasig:


Not familiar? Understandable. Most songwriters in the Philippines prefer to stay behind the curtains. But you might remember him from his songs, namely "Ale (Nasa Langit Na Ba Ako)" and the favorite song of philanderers everywhere, "Sana Dalawa ang Puso Ko".

And sadly, he has no Wikipedia page. Filipinos, get on it. Chop-chop.



Bodjie Dasig. 1964 ─ 13 March 2012.
We say goodbye to one of the most memorable bad guys of Philippine Cinema. With a career spanning 5 decades and 204 films, Mr. Paquito Diaz inspired so much fear on the silver screen that it even spilled over in real life.

Along with bearded Bombays (Indians) on their motorcycles, Paquito Diaz was often used by mothers to scare their children into taking afternoon naps. Well, for all I know, Paquito Diaz could have been a nice guy in real life, with his badassery being just an act that earned him his bread and butter. But his son Joko Diaz also turned out as an on- and off-screen bad boy, so following the "like father, like son" formula, a nice guy Paquito Diaz could very well be just pure fiction.

So here he is, one last time, back in the days when the mere sight of his awesome mustache sent shivers down everybody's spines.

In a survey conducted during Martial Law, it was discovered that
people were more afraid of this moustache than of getting tortured by the military.


Francisco a.k.a. Paquito Bustillos Diaz. 28 May 1937 - 3 March 2011.


*some info from Wikipedia
pic from PiNaysaAmerika

The characters are cute and relatable and the story relies on unique dialogue more than it does on flash and formula. This is a live-action Filipino Indie film. Go figure.

I love Bunda, the big tough girl that even the boys were scared of. The last scene that pertains to her is vague, however.

There's also the heartbreaking story of nerdy Henry and made-over Sophia, whom he's tutoring.

Teachers Che Ramos, LJ Moreno and Ramon Bautista were awesome. I wish there was more of Ramon Bautista's comedy in the movie, though.

It has most of the details of the current Philippine highschool setting down. The movie touched on sexual orientation, love, religion, backstabbing, bullying, smoking, intramurals, and "being the change you want to see."

However, it only slightly touched on the topic of alcohol, which I think makes the movie inaccurate. It also made no mention of sex or drugs─the latter, in my experience, was rare in highschool anyway. Most highschools here don't allow weird haircuts and colored nails. Most highschools here also don't screen Padre Amaro or talk about the Nazi occupation in detail.

The script, by writer/director Jerrold Tarog falls short when the Social Studies teacher discusses the question of whether or not Filipinos are individualistic and then ends with "It's a case-to-case basis."

Anyway, 6.5 for a movie on the Filipino highschool experience is still good. Go watch it and laugh at the fact that you're now probably removed from that.

Also, compare this with the British series Skins and the American Glee.
"Back to rehab, bitches!"

Read this off a tabloid last Monday:

Baron Dinakma ang Suso ni Cherry Pie.

Now there's only one Cherry Pie in showbiz, and that's Cherry Pie Picache. And she's old. Well, not that old. But certainly not that young.

Well I guess her breasts are still firm though, because Baron wouldn't make a grab at them if they weren't.

Wait, no scratch that. It's Baron Geisler. He makes a grab at anything.

Good job, Baron. What would Philippine showbiz be without you?


Read the story here


*pic from ABS-CBN.


When I first saw the trailer of this film, I was immediately anxious. Sure, the cinematography and the production all seemed beyond lovely. But, when the trailer zoomed in on this being about a woman defying convention (and I know others even promoting it as a story about a woman ahead of her time), I knew something was going to be fucked up.

But I was so excited to watch it. One, the historical clothes and setting are so cute! Two, Dennis Trillo in suspenders! Three, I just didn't know how fucked up the story would be.

I mean really, "a story that must be told"? Why? Why do I have to listen to Hesus (Dolphy), son of Rosario, talk about her immoral mother? Dear Hesus, how does telling a story that focuses on the immorality of your mother cleanse her sins?

Here's the gist: American colonization period. Cigarette smoking, New York-schooled, and piano-playing Rosario takes a vacation in her father's hacienda. Then she falls poor-little-rich-girl in love with her father's worker, administrator of the hacienda. They flirt. They have sex. Father finds out and has the worker Vicente beaten almost to death.

Rosario's family moves out of the hacienda and sends Rosario to a nunnery (where the nuns are really stoically funny, I might add) to hide face from the *gasp* scandal. She was pregnant, of course.

But surely, love will find a way, right? So Vicente finds a way to send a letter to Rosario. They elope. And they raised a family and stuff.

Somewhere along the way, Vicente catches tuberculosis and the inevitable patriarchal disease of being an asshole. First, he gets mad at Rosario for wanting to have a job. Next, he gets mad at Rosario for having sexual needs.

Rosario, with the so boring life she has, gets seduced by Alberto (Dennis Trillo? Who wouldn't?) and cheats on her husband. Dear Vicente, it's okay not to have sex with your wife since you are sick and all, but to brush her off like that? Like it's sinful to want sex from her husband? After she takes care of every little basic need you have? God, it wasn't an age of "beauty and innocence." It was an age of really self-righteous people (men?).

Rosario and Alberto get caught, of course. Vicente takes it to court. The immoral Rosario and Alberto get exiled from the country. Wow, I really hope Philippine laws improved even just an iota.

So I don't know how getting exiled works, because the film didn't inform me too, but time cut comes in and Rosario and Alberto comes back to the Philippines with their son Hesus. They rent a place, Alberto leaves Rosario and Hesus, another guy gets attracted to Rosario, and it was about this time that I just really gave up on the film. (It took me this long, I'm patient, I guess.)

Other things happen. Rosario suffers from missing her children with Vicente, but we all know she deserves it, that HALIPAROT. She's forced to pay rent with sex. The landlord gets beaten almost to death because of this other guy in love with Rosario. And then stuff. And then Hesus tells us that he has now told the story of his mother and hopes that it cleanses her sins. Actually, all throughout the film, he keeps telling us that his mother sinned. Even the legit one with falling in love with Vicente.

And then there's this dream-like scene where Rosario was playing the piano with her children. And I'm like, what the fuck? The whole film focuses on her "sinning," on her having sex, and aside from this last bit, the children only had three or four scenes. Some of which only existed in a montage. The movie expects me to feel for her? How can I? With Hesus telling me how sinful his mother was? When the movie lay heavy on everything that Rosario supposedly did wrong?

First of all, I have this nagging notion inside me that all of our ancestors weren't as "prim and proper" as we make them out to be. I don't think Rosario was the only one who had sexual needs and did something about it.

Two, a woman defying convention? A woman ahead of our time? Because of, huh, sex? How about the ones not because of sex, can we make a film about them? Like those who joined the war against the colonizers. Yes, people. We know this. There are women fighting for our country's freedom. From the Spaniards, to the Americans, to the Japanese, and to this present day.

Three, okay. We don't want to make a film about class conflicts and wars. We want to focus on how bourgeois stuff were like back in that historical backdrop. Okay then. But if you tell me that she defies convention and she's ahead of her time, why is the movie so keen on emphasizing how she has "sinned"? Is that how to be ahead of my time? I should "sin"? What will this do for me, as a woman in this period? Prevent me from having sex and supporting the RH Bill? Because well, according to this movie, sex is baaaaaaaaaad.

Fourth, she's not even ahead of her time at all. She, like other women then and even today, is as domestic and as caged in patriarchal ideologies.

Fifth, this would all have been solved if they took out Hesus' narrating and preaching. Or if they had the guts to take it further, they could have also focused on everything that this woman lost when she was under each man's wings, and focused on everything she gained when she wasn't. It could then have had the same tragic ending, without the stupid moral lesson. Only the lack of redemption─in a sense that a really unconventional angle (unconventional because it looks like in matters of women, we simultaneously progress and regress) would be to present her not as a sinner, but as a woman wronged by her milieu.

4/10
For Dennis Trillo and the lovely production.
Metanoia, not Marinduque.
First off, boo to Robinsons MovieWorld for not showing this in 3D. Are you saving on your electric bills? Or are you too selfish to bring out your 3D glasses for the holidays? Cheapskates.
Sorry, families. No 3D films for the holidays.
Overall, laudable effort from the folks at Thaumatrope Animation. Of course, it's not as perfect as Pixar, but that's only because we are a Third World country.
Like us.
But still, for a Third World country to come out with something like this... I'd have to take my hat off. Well, first I'd have to buy myself a top hat like that character Mang Ernie wears, then I'd wear it, then I'd take it off.
"You like my hat, eh?"
Okay, first off: we must stop comparing it to Pixar. Just like we should stop dreaming about playing in the 2014 World Cup. We're not there yet. But we're getting there.
"Wanna bet?"
So let us judge this film on its own merits. It has the look of those animated segments in video games, but cleaner, more polished. And some of you may also notice that the sequences inside Metanoia (the online world) look a bit choppy. Well, it helps to create a visual difference between the real world and the online world. Great move there, Luis (let's pretend I'm close friends with the director, Luis Suarez). More than half of the movie takes place online, so that saved them a hell of a lot of rendering time. And in fact, that is the reason why this film took five years to make. I'd say that in their heaviest scenes (meaning the scenes with the most elements), it probably took more or less twenty-four hours to render one single frame. But that actually depends on how fast their computers are.
"Wait... what?"
Anyway, great film. One small step for Filipino animation, one giant leap for... Filipino animation. Darn. But the legacy of this film will be measured not by how much it rakes from the box office (no thanks to cheapskates like you, Robinsons MovieWorld), but by how many full-length animated films get made after this. This film will open eyes, and will result in not just one kid in the audience thinking, "I'm going to be an animator when I grow up!" This film will also open pockets, as investors will start thinking, "Think of how much we can make with the merchandising!"

And if you can, please come up with a new film? I have enjoyed this one, and cannot wait for another one. Can you do it like once a year? And you don't have to release in December with all those Metro Manila Film Fest losers (except maybe Rosario, but I haven't seen it yet). This film is already a winner in my book.


*pics from Movie News, Me Likes Art, Science Leadership Academy, icis.com, Trips or Treats, and Robinsons MovieWorld (BOO!)


RPG Metanoia. Philippines. 2010.


Rating: Eight out of ten.
Hiring Aga Muhlach as one of the voice actors: One out of ten.
Kim Chiu is so thin! If I was Gerald Anderson, I'd go for that other chick who played his ex in this film. Now that's yummy shit! Kim on the other hand, not so much.
Kim Chiu on opening night.
Well, it's the usual Pinoy movie plot for this flick. The love story shit really gets stale, especially if the title of the movie is a title of a past hit. Which is the standard right now for Pinoy movies. If you want your movie to be a hit here─and it's not the Metro Manila Film Festival yet─then make sure that your movie title must be a song title of some past, cheesy hit.
I guess same thing goes for this movie...
The chronological distortion technique that they've used in this flick really sucked! It wasn't anythin' like 21 Grams or The Prestige. They just inserted flashbacks in between the real time event (which is Kimerald sitting in a coffee shop, talkin' about breakin' up) just to show us that they can do somethin' different other than the usual chronological style that directors here seem to collectively have.

As for Mr. Anderson, if it wasn't for this flick, I wouldn't know that he could speak fluent Tagalog. I don't watch Pinoy Big Brother and ABS-CBN shows so I really wouldn't know shit, right? That's why.
I thought this dude only knew Portuguese and a li'l English?!
Overall rating is 4.5 out of 10 due to the fact that the plot and story are lame!



*images from askmen.com, jasperfforde.com, costumeskeleton.com, rochellesychua.com
If you take a burger with you inside the theater, it’ll turn into a cheeseburger. That’s because this is possibly the cheesiest Filipino film. Ever.

Cheesier than that.

Might as well bring a plastic bag with you when you watch it, just in case you feel the need to throw up at some of the cheesiest lines ever delivered onscreen.

Since we’re on the subject of amnesia, here are a few things most of us might have forgotten:

1. Good acting does wonders to a film.
Among all the John Lloyd leading ladies, I think Toni Gonzaga has the best acting chops of them all. Although this is a rom-com, Ms. Gonzaga tends to focus more on the rom than on the com. Which is good, because it shows that she has a serious side.

"Listen to me... we need this watermark to protect us from copyright infringement."

2. Carlos Agassi is an annoying douche.
Yeah, we get it. You’re ripped, and you got a nasty six-pack. But who the hell cares, man? The girls may be screaming for you, but the guys honestly just want to beat the crap out of you. Shove your six-pack up your ass, douchebag.

The tux doesn't lessen the douchebaggery.

3. A John Lloyd flick is worth watching.
No, I’m not saying this because John Lloyd is a great actor. He’s a good actor, maybe, but not great. So why do I say that his films are worth watching? It’s because the film industry believes that John Lloyd films are potential blockbusters, so they focus all the best people to work on those projects. So it’s actually the collaborative effort of all the filmmakers who believe in John Lloyd, and not John Lloyd’s mere presence, that makes a John Lloyd movie great.

Sign of douchebaggery: Not showing your teeth.

4. Atoy Co’s hair looks like… shit.

"But I can dunk!"

Honestly, how many more basketball players will they resurrect from the grave? Not all ballers can act. So please don’t do this again. I’m talking to you, Star Cinema.

5. This is the cheesiest Filipino film ever.

I've already said that.

But let me just expound. The title makes it seem like this was ripped off from a Korean film, but surprisingly, the story is all-Filipino. And for those who didn’t know, there were actually three scriptwriters involved, so the sheer volume of cheesy lines shouldn’t come as a surprise anymore.

And since this movie has “Cheesiest Film Award” written all over it, let me share with you a line that someone once said to me:
“Pirata ka ba? Kamukha mo kasi si Johnny Depp e.”
Boom.


*pics from Will Video For Food, Pinoy Movie Blog, Asian Bitejonas.ph, Sri Lanka DOT, and Wordpress


My Amnesia Girl. Philippines. 2010.


Original rating: Seven out of ten.
Me crying at the birthday scene: Plus half a point.
Final rating: Seven and a half out of ten.
Look, Dingdong, this cat can act better than us.

This is the reason why movies like One More Chance stand out.

Dialogue sucked. The story sucked a bit too. Although nothing that a good director couldn't have made better.

Anyway, here's my take on the stars.

Dingdong Dantes: Your acting doesn't really stand out. Maybe with a few more movies. And I hope they pit you against the really great actors. So you'd get better. Because you kind of suck.

Marian Rivera: Okay, you're really pretty, and I don't know any guy who wouldn't have sex with you. Your facial expressions are really animated, which is good. But the way you deliver your lines─classic Filipino delivery. Which means it sucks.

Manilyn Reynes: You've grown fat. And I've never liked you since the eighties. Which means you suck.

Jacklyn Jose: You've grown fat as well. But it doens't matter. You are the only actress worth noting in this movie. I love your Ilocano accent. Why didn't Marian Rivera speak in an Ilocano accent as well, considering both of you are from Benguet? The only answer is: Marian Rivera cannot do a decent Ilocano accent to save her life. Because she sucks.


And on a final note: Can the Filipino film producers stop using American song titles as movie titles? Please? Thank you.


*pic from The Delano Observer


You to Me are Everything. Philippines. 2010.


Rating: Four out of ten.
 
Better late than never.

This was supposed to be released yesterday, the fortieth day of Redford White's death. I cannot let his memory fade without paying tribute to a great comedian.

Redford White doesn't really belong to the slapstick-sidekick type of actors. At least I don't remember him being slapped around the way Panchito slaps Babalu around. He's more of a lead actor. Just check out the screen name. It's classier than the average Filipino sidekick.

Anyway, I don't really have a lot to say about Redford White. My clearest memories of him are from the TV show Buddy en Sol. They used to do knock-knock jokes at the end of each episode, before going to bed. That's probably where I got my knock-knock knack, but I wouldn't really bet on it. And I highly doubt that I would've still watched that show if it were just Eric Quizon in it. I think Redford White was like eighty percent of the reason I watched that show.

And finally, I've always wondered whether Redford White has Caucasian blood, or is an albino. Not that it would affect my perception of him. I just want to know. But none of that matters now, as he is already in a place where skin color does not matter.


Redford White a.k.a.Cipriano Cermeño II, 5 Dec 1955 - 25 Jul 2010


*some info from Wikipedia
pic from uktodaynews.com

Let us grieve for one of the pillars of modern Philippine slapstick.

Palito will always be remembered as a mere sidekick. Yes, he is a team player. And yet most people know that he starred as a lead in several movies, most notably Rambuto, and James Bone, both spoofs of American movies, and both using "bone" in the title. And strangely, Palito's bones, which brought him to the heights of his showbiz career, are all that we have left of him.


Palito a.k.a. Reynaldo Alfredo Hipolito, 4 Sep 1934 - 12 Apr 2010


*some info from Wikipedia
pic from Dennis Villegas at flickr.com


**a great article, from which the Wikipedia entry lifts heavily from, can be found in dennisvillegas.blogspot.com


This year's issue of Shake Rattle & Roll features the stories "Ang Diablo", "Ukay-ukay" and "Lamang Lupa".

"Ang Diablo" is about a doctor named Claire who lost her faith when she saw police murder her family, when she was still a girl. She realizes that her doll inhabits demons who protect and eventually possess her.

The film works to scare people as it draws from that (almost) universal fear of demon possesion. The story does take-off from The Exorcist. I like how they also pitted the fear of the evil in living people, as seen in the people who killed her parents ( Mas matakot ka sa buhay, kesa sa patay) vs. the fear we get from Judeo-Christian mythology. There was also a scene where Janice De Belen, a nurse, stands in front of a refrigerator, which is a fun reference to the first Shake Rattle & Roll but seemed unrelated to the whole story. And boo for using a different voice to dub over Marc Anthony Fernandez's.

"Ukay-ukay" stays true to the horror comedy theme when bride-to-be Ruffa Gutierrez is haunted by a vintage dress that she bought from a thrift-shop. Great performance from Megan Young who plays the ghost who haunts the dress who becomes a zombie who becomes Sadako crawling down the stairs and into a burning well. I love how all three films show gore and horror in broad daylight. I love John Lapuz's line when he told the gown "Fashion designer ako. Gown ka lang!" Later in the movie, Ruffa Gutierrez screams , "Harold, nagbalik na yung gown!!!"

I liked "Lamang Lupa" for it's story telling. It starts with a girl that police officers find in the middle of a forest. They question her on how their camping trip ended up with all six of her friends dead. She then gives an account of how her friends get killed by evil dwarf like creatures for disturbing their punso or earth mounds which aren't their homes but incubation structures for their children. (Bit of retelling the whole nuno myth there.)

Boo for the lazy transitions. Yey for Rico Gutierrez's direction and some shots in the first film. I give the whole film a 7/10 which is way higher than I expected to give it. Haha.

2009 has been a year of great losses, and this month we have lost one of the best actors of Philippine Cinema.

I've known Johnny Delgado since the Bad Bananas, and I thought (and still do) that they were the funniest comedy troupe in Philippine showbusiness, funnier even than Tito, Vic, and Joey.

But my first appreciation of his full acting potential was back in film school, when I saw Mike de Leon's short film Aliwan Paradise. And I already marked him down as the most natural local actor I have ever seen. His acting style is subtle, yet full of energy, and the way he delivers his lines--you would never sense that he was speaking lines from a script, as they are colloquial and natural. I don't know if the directors give him license to paraphrase, or if he just does a damn good job.

Film historians will tell you that Johnny Delgado is the son of director Ben Feleo. But what few people know is that he is the director's adopted son. His natural father is Sixto Esquivias, Jr. He is an Esquivias. My mother's first cousin. My uncle by blood.


Johnny Delgado a.k.a. Juan Marasigan Feleo. 1948-2009.


*some info from Wikipedia
pic from pixelgrain.biz
Eugene Domingo as Kimmy and Dora Go Dong Hae is funny and witty as ever.

Although, there is something to be said about how the film passes off as
absurd while still keeping up a believable simulation of reality.

The exaggerated characters are based on how real people and real Filipinos behave. I saw this movie with my family and we were joking about how some of them, us, acted like some people in the movie sometimes.

Plot-wise, it's perfectly believable and funny for a person to get hit by a moving cart and stay standing while the cart falls to pieces and the cart passengers also remain unscathed.

It's also funny and well set-up that a twin and heiress would be tortured by being slapped with rubber slippers.

We could even forgive and like the cheesy song number in the end.

We can, however, stop suspending disbelief when a real looking bullet stops mid-air and acts confused at which twin to shoot. (Why shoot anyway when you don't even know which twin to arrest?) Or when a real-looking dog acts cartoony like those bobbing head toys. (Or is that just me being peeved about the use of CGI in some Philippine movies?)

Also, why did Johnson (Ding Dong Dantes) really talk Dora, the simpleton twin, who is also the object of his affection, into pretending that she was the dominatrix twin Kimmy and lie to their dad about Kimmy's true state? Unresolved but, o well, not actually important.

Rating: 8/10

(Movie poster from the KimmyDora website.)
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