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Ang Lalake sa Skeptic Tank

I've been meaning to write a review of Ang Babae Sa Septic Tank, but I was too busy banging myself with a spoon to actually bother spending more of my time on it than I already had watching it. The only reason I'm blogging about it now is because my boss is here and I have nothing to do, so I must act like I'm busy. Might as well write a no-brainer. Writing this review is moot and academic. I know I wouldn't be saving any of your time having either seen it or the movie's run is finally over by the time this comes out.

Ang Babae Sa Septic Tank is the movie adaptation of a really snarky blog entry. Or what should have been just a really snarky blog entry somehow managed to find enough producers to turn it into a sustained digital narrative. Great premise, fun idea. BUT STILL, NO STORY, NO INSIGHT.

The movie follows three characters as they suffer through pre-production of their "indie movie". Understandably, those who haven't had the experience of suffering through a pre-prod meeting finds this cute, and endearing in their "I'm a hipster, I have a Tumblr, that makes me an authority of style and good taste" way. But those of us who actually have to suffer through pre-prod meetings just got bored. So, yeah, you run through a scene several times in your head, you discuss the idea with the rest of the team, you imagine how the project would go if you consider other casting options, minor re-writes, major revisions, etc. The movie rambled on and on about it, and we forgive it because it's cute, it's endearing. It's shallow, it's snarky, but so what? Eugene Domingo is in it.

Which is the only thing good about this movie: Eugene Domingo. Eugene Domingo managed to turn herself into a character without turning into a caricature. The only reason why people sat through this movie long enough to finish it is to see what craziness Ms. Eugene Domingo will inflict on the audience next. This is a Eugene Domingo movie through and through, and she deserves to have a baby in Africa crated to the Philippines for her to adopt.

Otherwise, the movie is just an over-hyped affair that showcased its best scenes in the trailer. It lacks a plot, the two major characters are indistinguishable, and the jokes are too in-jokey to be effective. We get it, poverty is being depicted in a sick, pornographic way in cinemas. But do you really need to make a movie for that? And if so, now that you've made one, how did you make a difference? Yes, yes, we get the joke; we get the snarky reference to TROPES. Dammit, do you think we don't read TVtropes.org?

Ultimately, good cinema is good storytelling. Ang Babae sa Septic Tank is an example of a good telling, thanks to Ms. Eugene Domingo's brilliant comedic talent. Period. No story here, sorry. Unless you're willing to wade through shit just to prove it has one.

[Edit] As Sting Lacson requested for me to include pictures in this review, I have this instead. It's Ms. Eugene Domingo greeting me a happy birthday:


Taray ng review! Also, Y U No Put Pictures?

Claire said...

Ako naman sa tingin ko may story, may insight, smart, self-reflexive at therefore sinisiraan pati ang sarili, pero ang gloom and doom ay hindi siya enjoyably nakakatawa. At tama, dahil kay Eugene Domingo lang. Kahit the lamest line na itapon niya nakakatawa na e.

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